


next top model

by windsilk



Series: just don't close your heart [4]
Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, bc we were all rooting for them, nancy kerrigan and tonya harding would be bffs if they read this homage, tyra banks would be so proud of everyone involved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-12
Updated: 2018-12-12
Packaged: 2019-09-16 19:52:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16960446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/windsilk/pseuds/windsilk
Summary: All's fair in love and passive aggressive fashion battles.





	next top model

**august 25** –

didn’t eat breakfast. definitely a mistake—decided to allocate time picking out the Outfit That Will Define Who I Am for the next foreseeable future instead of dedicating it to food. tummy now sounds like I’ve got the most insane case of indigestion.

ech.

but! academically, I am excited. I picked the optimal seat—third row, middle chair. syllabus day is always a waste of space, but I’m stoked for ochem 2 and that beginner’s swimming class ino is making me take with her. only time will tell if I’m too obvious about the fact that I already know how to swim.

crap. still hungry.

I am killing it, though. cotton tomato-red t-shirt dress, adidas sneakers, and paul mccartney strawberry jacket. cat eye eyeliner. coral lip. worth it.

I am on a level that defies levels. I am–

shit. 

this guy just walked in and he’s wearing a completely denim outfit like he’s going to the 2001 AMAs. who does this guy think he is?? I can’t fucking believe this

??????????????????????

his friend is wearing an entirely orange tracksuit. 

¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿

whatever he doesn’t have a denim cowboy hat so how can you wear that and not commit  
WEAK

//

 **august 27** –

I got one of those new yoplait yogurt glass jar things today–french style yogurt! I’m thinking about keeping the jars? for succulents, obvi.

 _anyway_. it’s early. I spent way too long getting ready last time, so I got up super early and overshot it. it’ll be worth it when I crush the shit out of that guy today.

here’s the down low: dark blue palazzo pants over white platform heels. white button down tucked in which came with this solid crisp cloth belt, tied in a bow at the waist. I parted my hair down the middle. dark red lipstick. am I just a girl with some cool pants or am I vaguely pulp fiction mixed with gaby from the man from uncle?

(the white thick rim sunglasses are in my bag)

a strong contender!

also, REMINDER SAKURA—buy swimsuit for beginner’s swimming!!  

fucking…where is he?? class starts in like 30 secs. even his tracksuit friend is here. whatev. he prob dropped bc he was ashamed. GOOD.

_econ notes_

> the pareto optimum is point at which mktpl resource allocation is at its best, can’t change without sacrificing someone in the process

> e.g. chouji and chips, you can’t have more chips without chouji dying, and you can’t have less chips without chouji crying.

> see demand curve, sli

!!!!!

he is here. TARDINESS IS SO UNATTRACTIVE.

and he’s wearing an ugly christmas sweater. the sleeves are pushed up to his elbows, forearms visible. it is honest to god hideous. it has pom poms glued to it. there are some vans, dark jeans, and he is  _eating_  a fucking  _candy cane._

_IT IS AUGUST._

oh god. he passed by me on the way to his tracksuit friend. he said: “nice pajama pants”

UGHUYUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRGGGG

//

 **august 29** –

TODAY IS THE DAY I KILL

I am wearing a god awful 1994 figure skating tour of the world (sponsored by campbell’s soup) t-shirt, mom jeans, and a 1980s moscow olympics themed denim jacket.

I even ate a protein shake. I’m going to punch him in the face.

or maybe I’ll hire a hit man to break his legs, if I really want to commit to the olympics figure skating theme

tracksuit keeps looking at me and waggling his eyebrows. at least I’ve won over the sidekick.

…

he’s here: donald duck jacket. on his head—donald duck hat where the beak is the bill of the hat. and, icing on the cake: donald duck socks tucked into, I shit you not, highlighter yellow yeezys.

what a fucking power move.

I’m definitely going to break his l–

he drops his hat on my head on his way to his seat and had the audacity to grin. “cool soup shirt, tonya.”

SOUP SHIRT???????? if I were a cartoon character, my scalp would be literally aflame.

I wait until after class and when he’s finally walking out with tracksuit, I walk up behind him and kick him in the shin, tossing his hat at his chest.

“go die, nancy.”

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by this   
> http://m4ge.tumblr.com/post/165046137965/theres-a-guy-in-one-of-my-classes-who-i-am


End file.
